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Hell in a Handbasket

tlov

Well-Known Member
So they still think he has cystinuria but he also has a uti and that's causing him having trouble urinating?


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She didn't say specifically uti I think she meant a prostate infection. I'm not 100% sure. She was a little frustrated at having to explain everything again. Out appointment was at 3. I got off work at 330. My wife was supposed to be at work at 330. I met her at the vets office to get Hank and let her leave and she was writing the rx when I got there. I asked if she could tell me all what she told my wife. She was the only vet and the desk clerk started that she was double booked. I was lucky to have even gotten him in, in the first place and was more concentrated on what pills to give when and how many times to soak what a day.
 

tmricciuto

Well-Known Member
I sure hope they get this figured out. It really frustrates me when a Dr or Vet won't give me the time I deserve. I don't have a medical background so I don't know the information you're providing. I'm very happy that my vets will spend all the time I need with them. And I am very accommodating when they are late to my appt as I know it means they are spending necessary time with another patient.
 
It frustrates me when I can't go to the vet and I specifically ask my wife to write stuff down and she doesn't. So tomorrow I'll call the vet but give the jist of what I got from her now.What I thought was going to be a $90 visit turned into a $361.90 visit. But, they did an ultrasound AND 2 radiographs. They also did another urinalysis via catheter this time and what my wife told me was this. They said there were no stones (THANK GOD) BUT, there were so many cystine crystals it was like a sludge (my wife's exact words). His prostate is def swollen but there was no infection but they still want him to finish the Cephalexin because of the possible infection with his paws. They gave us Vetprofen to help with the swelling of his prostate.

Also apparently at some point in time, some motherfucker shot my dog with a pellet gun because they saw a pellet somewhere near his pelvis... They ordered the Hills U/D for us and are charging $83, I found it for $75 online but then I figure + shipping or w/e it prob works out the same. That's not included in today's bill though. That's the price for a 30lb bag. I'm not sure how many cups that works out to but he normally eats 6 cups a day of the food we currently feed. Expensive as hell but that is supposed to help prevent stones and will supposedly help with the crystals.

That's all I have for now until I call the vet for more specific info tomorrow. Unless that really is all they said but somehow I just feel like she's forgetting or leaving out pertinent information.
 

7121548

Well-Known Member
The absence of stones and infection is a relief, but what the hell with the pellet?!? I'd be outraged about that! And maybe the bill also.
 
I was but how am I ever going to prove who did it? There's nothing I can do about either so I just have to be thankful that he is prob not as bad off as He could have been. It's still going to be costly to manage and to have him neutered. There's still a couple weeks to decide what I'm going to do with Roxy and her litter. Abort, or let her try and have it. One way will cost money for sure, the other way has a potential to cost even more if there are complications.
 
Then there is the guilt and the shame of having the litter in the first place. The fact that I won't be able to live with myself without telling potential owners that his daddy has cystinuria and so the pups may or may not. That neither parents are health tested. I'm disgusted with myself.
 

tmricciuto

Well-Known Member
EEM, please be nice to yourself. Stuff like this happens all the time and as long as you are honest with people it will all be ok. It's not like you are setting out to deceive people. I have learned the hard way that sometime I just have to throw up my hands, acknowledge what's going on and keep it moving. You staying in a bad head space is not healthy for your wife or you pups. You are a great husband and puppy daddy, but some things are way out of you CONTROL...so stop trying to control them. If you had seen someone shot your dog you would have handled it. You didn't and he didn't show you signs of suffering when it happened so keep it moving. Figure out what you are going to do with Roxy and just make PEACE with the decision and keep it moving. All this negative energy you are putting out into the universe is doing nothing but coming right back to you. Please think about all of the positives in your life and just figure out how to put one step in front of the next one.

And yes I meant to use caps to emphasize my point.
 
Thank you. I realise that my negativity gets the best of me, after the fact.It's hard to control.

Speaking of control, I have control issues. As in, I hate when I'm not in control of just about every aspect of my life(my pups included). It might sound dumb, it did to me when it was suggested, but I carry around a "Ctrl" key from a keyboard in my pocket so even when I don't have control, I can sort of have some sense of ctrl. I hate it though when I feel like I could have done better.

I'm very much the type of person that makes statements like, "If you want something done right you have to do it yourself." I can't do everything myself though. I don't have the skill set, the time, the energy, the money. I can't be every place all at once. I hate that fact. I hate leaving anything that may affect me up to anyone else because I have no faith that it will get done or get done right. Most of the time it doesn't, IMO. I have no faith in anyone, trust in anyone. Then I'm left dissatisfied, perturbed, even resentful.

I'm hard on myself because I expect and hope that others would expect more of themselves and most don't. I can't be perfect, never will be, but fuck me if I don't try my best. I have pride and it hurts. I don't understand how so many other people don't and live pain free. I have a conscience and I can't ignore it. I wish I could be some fucktard without a care in the world that puts no thought into life's decisions and lives happier because of it. That's not me. I'm over critical, analytical, everything means something and every option should be weighed and considered. I want to do my best, be the best, expect the best, and more often than not it's not enough and I never even come close. Despite all my best efforts everything always seems to fall short. I don't know how to break the cycle.

I feel like If I'm not in control than everything will be shit because no one cares about whatever it is as much as I do. Pair that with no faith and distrust in my fellow man, and time and again being proven that's exactly the case. I can't be everything, do everything, accomplish everything that I want alone but if no one else fucking cares then that means I'm stuck with whatever I have, wherever I'm at, and I'm never going to move forward because I can't do it all myself. I have to much drive to just give up and not enough resources to move forward. Sitting here spinning my wheels with the engine redlined and seriously ready to just throw a rod right through the oil pan.
 

BAMCB

Well-Known Member
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Be kind to yourself, we've all made mistakes. The more you rehash and not let go the worse it gets. I've laid awake for HOURS and YEARS beating myself up over and over of everything I've done wrong, or so I thought. Turns out that's not always the truth but my inner critic. Be grateful for what you do have and more good things will come:)


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Smokeycat

Well-Known Member
I can understand how you feel about not trusting others to do what needs to be done and how stressed that can make you when you have no choice but to rely on someone to do their part. Last year I was definitely in a bad mind space and while I knew that it was only hurting me I couldn't make myself change how I was reacting to the fact that they were not keeping to the set schedule so I couldn't either. That is until I just happened to see a photocopy attached to the wall of someone's cubicle in an office I cleaned. I don't know what made me notice it and perhaps it had been up for a while as it was slightly crumpled but for some reason it struck a chord inside me and has stayed with me since.
"Don't take life so seriously. It's not like you're going to come out alive."
The way I react to things I can't control started to change that night. It took work and I still hate having to rely on trusting others to do their share of the work but it no longer stresses me out. I've chosen not to allow others to have that sort of control over me. Hopefully you can have your moment that helps you learn/choose to how you let the behavior of others to affect you.

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Thanks. I'm working on it! Everyone have a great day.

Maybe that's why I like my job. It's on my time lol. No pink slip? No receipt!? NO admittance. Sorry, take it up with management.

Also I met an old man named Marion. Just like John Wayne's real name. I dunno how old he is, but he already remembered most people's names inside the store. I haven't even done that! :p
 

tmricciuto

Well-Known Member
"Don't take life so seriously. It's not like you're going to come out alive." The way I react to things I can't control started to change that night. It took work and I still hate having to rely on trusting others to do their share of the work but it no longer stresses me out. I've chosen not to allow others to have that sort of control over me. Hopefully you can have your moment that helps you learn/choose to how you let the behavior of others to affect you.Sent from my SM-G920W8 using Tapatalk

Here is what I'm going to share with you EEM. I used to be a miserable person. Not to others, but I was just miserable. I had a worry stone that I kept with me and it became a habit to just rub the heck out of it because I was always just in so much internal turmoil. Then I went to a training for work and learned about the 'circle of control', this is what changed my life. I had to learn to not worry or think about things that were outside of my circle of control. This simple act actually gave me more power because I could look at what I can control and take actionable steps towards a goal. With Hank, you have a lot of control in your circle. You control the food that he eats, the vet that he sees, the environment he lives in, the care he is given. You have direct influence over all of those things and don't have to rely on anyone but yourself for those things...so work on changing those things.

Here is another thing I'm going to share with you that I don't really share. My first husband was very verbally abusive and it became physical. I was with him until our daughter turned 2 and then I had to leave. My next husband wasn't abusive, but he was negligent. He didn't really interact with the family or the kids (we had 2 sons together). He was a spender and didn't care if the mortgage couldn't be paid as long as he got what he wanted. He knew exactly how to make me feel guilty about his bad behavior. We were married for 12 years but actually together for 16. When he left me for another woman I was devastated. But then I realized that I was the problem in these relationships (yes the point is coming soon). I allowed people to treat me a certain way and I also didn't trust anyone because of these two morons. I was able to take away two very important rules and my life has changed. 1) I choose to see the good in people and believe that everyone is doing the absolute best they can, because that's what I'm doing, and 2) I choose to not take on the world but to ask people I trust to help me out. This has moved me forward in life. I stopped the circle that I was in. I truly believe that we are put in situations in order to learn, and until we learn we will continue to go through the same struggles. Once I stopped reacting the same way I was able to find a calm strength within me, I was able to hand over some of my struggle to others who actually helped me out and I was able to move forward. I trusted in myself and my abilities and was able to get a great job that meets the needs of where I am right now (I'm having a lot of problems with my youngest son and need to be readily available to deal with him, he's 16, and I have a job working from home that allows me a lot of liberties), I am in a fantastic marriage with a man who is my equal, and I'm able to take care of my mom as she has recently moved in with us.

I pray every night that God graces you so that you can see that people want to help you if you'll let them. I was amazed at how much money you raised so quickly from people who really don't know you. Some people could only give small amounts, but that might have been a huge sacrifice to them to help you. People do want to help but you have to be willing to let them help, and be compassionate if they mess up because we all are just doing the absolute best that we can at this very moment in time. Tomorrow I might be able to do a whole hell of a lot better.
 

Pastor Dave

Well-Known Member
I've heard it said that "When you have kids, you don't have anything else. That's really true of dogs. We have blonde Chevy hair everywhere....especially on my comfy sweatpants. Nothing compared to your broken doors, but....I'm sure you'll get things put back together.
 
Thanks so much. This really opened something in my mind tmricciuto. You are right I need to be more aware of my circle and put more concentration there instead of worrying about what's beyond my circle.

It is truly awe inspiring the help and support I've received financially, intellectually, and spiritually from the friends I've been making here. I've undergone lots of change, made some major discoveries about myself, and made so much progress in my personal life thanks to the people here on this forum. I want you all to know it's truly, and greatly appreciated and you will not be forgotten.

A lil update on Hank: He had noticeable blood in his urine this morning. His pee stream is deff not getting any better. Monday morning for sure I will be getting him into the vet A.S.A.P. I don't know where we go from here but something isn't right and I have no idea what it is.

He had no stones in the radiograph nor the ultrasound. I was actually informed by the vet that they weren't able to get the cath in but she felt that it wasn't a stone blocking the path that is was some bone in the penis? I'm worried sick for my boy and I'm not quite sure what to do. All I can do is talk to the vet and see what they think. They called yesterday and said his food is in so we can get that on monday too and start him on his new diet.

On the homefront, I'm greatly appreciative of my new work situation. I'm working on getting more hours and today I'm going to do some work for A&T Mechanical. Every little bit helps. I'm also going to let the website go because I just don't have the skills or know how to get it done and it's costing me money rather than making me anything. My only complaint really is that now I hardly ever get to see my wife. She works nights and I work days. I'm out of the house before she gets home, she leaves before I get home. She has tuesday off, I'm off sunday monday. I don't really have any friends to spend time with, so I'm feeling a little lonely. Yesterday I went to a pizza joint and sat and watched the Army boys lose to the Navy and ate half a pizza all to my lonesome. The blue moon was good.
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season

Well-Known Member
My wife bought the biggest plastic one she could find and it wasn't big enough for Hank. My mom bought us a wire one (tractor supply had a 50% off sale on black friday) and he fits just fine I just believe he will trash it. As long as I get to keep bringing him to work with me I'm sure he'll be fine. He just loses his mind when there are bitches in heat. Now that he has cystinuria and we are not going to be able to breed him we are deff going to get him neutered (depending on if he needs surgery for his disease first or not and $$ of course) and hopefully that will help with his absolute bull headedness during those occasions. I had thought about tying him up too but I just think it's unethical to have a dog tied out and unsupervised for more than 5-15 minutes at a time.

I thought Solo would trash it too but I have it a try and it worked. It's worth a try. Could save u a lot of money and stress.


"Today is victory over yourself of yesterday."
- Miyamoto Musashi
 

tmricciuto

Well-Known Member
We are here for you EEM any time you need to vent. I used to do the same type schedule when my kids were young and it was really hard, but it makes date night even better. You both have at least one night a week and half of Sunday so make the most of those days. Maybe make her breakfast in bed on Sunday and spend time in bed with the paper. There are lots of easy and cheap things you can do together.


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Jaszies_dad

Well-Known Member
There is only so much you can control... The best you can do is do your best.. Sometimes it's good enough sometimes it isn't.. But it is your best.. Best being what you can do physically, mentally and financially. If you did that you did your best.. And what is.. Is.. Life was and is never ment to be easy.. It challenges you everyday.. Meet that challenge the best you can.

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Aaaaand the worst has been realised. That first picture is the radiograph with the die. See the shoe lace looking thing with the little round balls inside? That's Cystine stone blocking Hanks urethra and causing him not to be able to pass urine.Also notice the pellet in there? Ya some fuck nugget shot my dog with a pellet gun... The second pic is of a stone they got out after they were trying to get a catheter in. Plenty more still in there. So They got a big needle and sucked 3 huge syringes worth of urine out of his bladder to offer a bit of relief. Tomorrow he goes in for surgery. They have to chop his balls off and cut him a new pee hole. He's going to pee like a girl for the rest of his life. Hopefully that will allow him to pass stones because they are getting stuck where the bone that holds his penis in place constricts his urethra. We were quoted just shy of $1800 as long as we could pay half now they will go ahead with it and take payments on the rest. Please send good vibes, prayers and what have you for our boy.