Welcome, it can be a challenge to find the perfect pup/breeder but so worth the wait!
I'm sorry to hear about your PTSD as going to the shows and meeting the breeders in person generally make it easier to establish contact. Perhaps your husband and kids could do that leg work for you just to open communication?
I got my first EM from NAncy Walker at Lazy D Mastiffs and she was a fabulous dog but was very protective of mom. I'm not experienced enough to know if she would have been more accepting of strangers with better socialization but I'm sure Nancy would know better about the temperament of her current dogs.
My current dog is a bull mastiff from Taylor Made Mastiffs and she would be a great therapy dog, she loves everyone but does have allergies and is afraid of loud noises. With early exposure to different environments I'm sure she would have been better.
Best of luck in your search
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