I am posting here because I believe that Mastiff ownership is a unique and profound relationship that only other Mastiff owners can totally relate too.
Last night I had to put my big girl to sleep, it all happened so fast my head and heart are still reeling, I feel like I've been hit by a truck. She was 8yrs old and was taken by gastric torsion.
I was lucky enough to be able to say goodbye as did one of my daughters, she was rushed to an out of hours vet where It was broken to me there was nothing they could do the tissues where damaged and she had shadows showing within her chest the kindest thing to do was to euthanize.
I know I did the right thing but hate myself for it. I feel like she knew what was coming her big brown eyes reassuring me that it was ok. She put her head on my shoulder and I put mine on hers ..I didnt feel strong enough to look at her face so watched her chest cease to rise and fall. She gave one last big sigh and was gone.
I never expected the intense pain I feel right now I almost feel like its too much to deal with I have cried all day....I even thought I heard her tail banging against the kitchen cupboards waiting for me to go say goodmorning.
Heartsore doesnt even begin to explain how at a loss I feel.
Last night I had to put my big girl to sleep, it all happened so fast my head and heart are still reeling, I feel like I've been hit by a truck. She was 8yrs old and was taken by gastric torsion.
I was lucky enough to be able to say goodbye as did one of my daughters, she was rushed to an out of hours vet where It was broken to me there was nothing they could do the tissues where damaged and she had shadows showing within her chest the kindest thing to do was to euthanize.
I know I did the right thing but hate myself for it. I feel like she knew what was coming her big brown eyes reassuring me that it was ok. She put her head on my shoulder and I put mine on hers ..I didnt feel strong enough to look at her face so watched her chest cease to rise and fall. She gave one last big sigh and was gone.
I never expected the intense pain I feel right now I almost feel like its too much to deal with I have cried all day....I even thought I heard her tail banging against the kitchen cupboards waiting for me to go say goodmorning.
Heartsore doesnt even begin to explain how at a loss I feel.